In starting down the path of Jediism, one of the most important things to do is a thorough self-examination. In doing this, one must determine to be as honest with himself as possible.
Through this examination, it can be discovered what is not of the Light in the way we think, feel and act. Only through acknowledgment(without any self-condemnation), can we then determine and take positive steps to change the situation. Many people walk through life unaware or with only a vague awareness and little or no acknowledgment of their less than desirable traits.
It is important also to examine the positive aspects of our being and that which is of the Light in our thoughts, feelings and actions. This keeps things in balance and makes us more aware of our strengths that we can draw upon as we go through life.
This examination can be done on paper by making two columns - one for the"negative" aspects and one for the positive aspects. For each "negative" aspect, try to write a positive aspect in the other column. Remember, the key is honesty here - with no self-condemnation. Most everybody on the planet has less than desirable traits. If this is personally difficult to do, a close friend or relative may be able to give you helpful input. Being willing to see these things in ourselves that are not of the Light and then making efforts to change them is an important part of the path of Jediism. As Jedi, through determination to change and right action, we can then become more aligned with the Light force and be of greater service as we become more attuned to the Light and the Will of the Force.
Practical Application
Once there is an awareness of those aspects of our being that need to be changed, the key to change is the determination to do so and the willingness to focus the light of awareness on every thought, feeling and action as we go through the day. (This can also be a great way to discover aspects of ourselves that we might not really have been aware of before.) It might be helpful to see oneself as the "higher self" sitting in the stands of a stadium and observing the actions of our human self on the playing field.
We don't need to try and change every "negative" aspect at once, but rather take one or a few at a time. Say we have discovered that anger, selfishness and insensitivity to other's feelings are some of the aspects we need to change in our being. By observing every instant that occurs each day regarding these things, the light of awareness itself will begin to undo those situations if the determination to change is strong enough. For example, just the very act of being aware that one is becoming angry can stop that anger in its tracks instead of letting it have its way as it has in the past. With constant awareness and application of action to overcome the negative aspect, a new, more positive momentum can be established.
As Jedi, we have determined to serve the Light. As we challenge and overcome the less desirable traits of our being and allow the Light of our positive aspects to gain momentum, we become greater and greater channels for the Light force and gain greater mastery.
There is a deeper reason for you reacting to others in an angry way.
I have found that self-examination ("why am I reacting like this? let me explore this further...") is a good way to start understanding why we react the way we do to others.
Always remember - between stimulus and response - there is a space. In that
space is a choice:
Do I react in a positive way?
Do I react in a negative way?
Do I not react period?
All of this happens in less than a microsecond. The choice is there.
Between stimulus and response is a choice.
Hypothetically, lets say that someone called you a bad name.
All of this happens in a microsecond :
Possible Internal dialogue:
"Who is saying this? Friend or foe? Is he kidding? Is he being serious? Why is he saying this? Is he trying to anger me? Is he joking with me? I'm beginning to get upset. Do I slug him? Walk away? Ask him why he said that? What?"
Emotions are extremely complex if-then-else algorithms that occur in less than a fraction of a second. The problem is that when we become upset, the other part of dealing with conflict never registers on the conscious mind:
"Why am I getting upset? What does this remind me of? Why does that bother me?"
One way to alleviate having to hurt someone that we may end up feeling sorry about - is - to slow it down - way down - breathe .... count to ten. Allow yourself time to consider what is really happening, versus what you may think is happening.
Then proceed.
Sounds simple. But sometimes it works. Try it. Also, try the Seven Steps meditation
- step one really helps letting go of the things that upset us.